Song of Solomon 8:7 “Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away.”

The Ashley Madison Agency, the self-proclaimed "world's premier discreet dating service," produced a 30-second spot to air during Sunday's broadcast of the NFL championship between the Pittsburgh Steelers and Arizona Cardinals.
CTV said in a statement it doesn't want an ad "promoting adultery" running alongside "quality brands" in its Super Bowl advertising roster.

Question: Husband Hesitant about Wife's New-Found Passion!
"I am an overweight, 40-something year old mother and wife ..., my husband is a ... truck driver. We have been married for 20 years and recently I quit taking the birth control pill. As a result my sex drive has skyrocketed. Until now sex was seldom and I felt like I needed to "do my duty". Not only that but it's like I see me husband in a whole new light, I am in love with him so much more than I ever thought possible! God is so good!

Here's the "but": he was getting ready to leave and I surprised him with a complete oral excitement, he seemed to thoroughly enjoy it, as it was something I hardly ever did in the past. He left for 4 days later that day. The next day I went shopping for some new "clothing" articles and called to let him know that I had a surprise for him.

Everything was fine on the phone until I told him what I had purchased, he then told me that this was all too much and he needed to think about it. I don't believe he was thinking about it on the day he left! This left me feeling very ashamed for the recent things I have initiated with him. Kind of like a, pardon the term, slut. He apologized and said he mis-spoke and it was not his intent to hurt me and I forgave him. I still desire him however I feel that if I pick up where we left off I will feel ashamed all over again. ANY advice here would be greatly appreciated."

Answer: Don’t be discouraged. In fact, it sounds to me like you have just become your husband’s “dream come true”!

Here’s what you and your husband need: open, face-to-face communication—preferably reading some instructive, biblically-based articles together! Your husband’s hesitation may result from not being sure whether oral sex is really OK, and/or perhaps from having some second thoughts about this radical upturn in sex.

Having said that, let me be somewhat frank: I think you have, like most wives, a sexual confidence issue. You mention you are overweight and that you feel ashamed when your husband hesitated somewhat talking about your recent sex. Being overweight doesn’t change your love for your husband, or your desire to please him sexually and have a better marriage than you have ever experienced. And, your sexual response is certainly nothing to be ashamed of! What I am saying is—-be confident! You are being an awesome wife!

My wife, Carrie, recently wrote a review for a book you may want to read: Shannon Ethridge's book, The Sexually Confident Wife, uncovers the often taboo subject of sexuality for wives from the understanding that sexual intimacy is foundational to a healthy, happy marriage.

Her insights challenge women to change their wrong thinking patterns to allow themselves to become who God designed them to be—sexually confident wives who are comfortable with and enjoy God's gift of sex in their marriages. Shannon candidly shares from hers and others' experiences addressing topics on sexuality that many women are afraid to broach.

Wives who apply the principles Shannon shares will discover the joy of experiencing true freedom in the marriage bed. As wives become more confident in their role in God's design for sexually intimacy, they are certain to experience a deeper connection with their husbands.

Carrie also addressed this same issue in an article from our website: Sexual Confidence for Women.

May I suggest a few articles from our website that you and your husband need to read together:
Is Oral Sex Okay?
Christian Views on Sex

May I also suggest you and your husband consider our e-book, The 7 Day Sex Challenge? Check it out here.

Keep up the good work; both you and your husband need to enjoy the “new you”!

Question about Using Sex-Toys such as Vibrators:
"Is it okay for a Christian to use sex toys during intercourse—toys such as a vibrator, etc.?"

Answer: Intimacy is based on communication, caring, commitment, and common values. Agreeing on what is “acceptable” is the common values part—and is the basis of your question about sex toys. Our first question must be: What does the Bible teach and say? The answer: nothing. And so, we recommend learning biblical principles that, when followed, develop intimacy and ignite sexual enjoyment!

These principles keep us close to God’s design and then, in turn, draw us closer to our spouse:

• the One and Only Principle: Sexual intimacy thrives within the covenant of marriage: there must be a relationship based on commitment and security.
• the Back to Basics Principle: Experiment, have variety, but don’t neglect genital union as the foundation of sex.
• the Hooked on You Principle: Don’t allow anything into your life that draws you away from your spouse. Your spouse must be the only person who sexually excites you (no porn!) and satisfies you.
• the Good For Both Principle: As long as it’s good for both—not hurtful or demeaning, but pleasurable, then go for it!
• the Give and Take Principle: Focus on your spouse being pleasured. Determine if a hesitation (trying oral sex, for example) is a moral or biblical issue, or the result of upbringing. Sex is meant to be fun!

Mark's book includes his story, the story of a pastor in one of the most secular cities in America, and his battle to remain relevant while communicating the transforming truth of salvation through Jesus. Although this book is not about marriage or relationships, it is noteworthy that one hallmark of his church (Mars Hill, in Seattle, Washington), is the clear and prominent teaching about marriage and sex.
Mark Driscoll truthfully answers the questions (Yes, all of the questions!) about sex and marriage that today’s generation is asking. Interestingly, one of the first question/answers that stirred up significant controversy was his statement that oral sex between married Christians was to be encouraged—and he used a reference from the Bible to support his view! (see Christian Views on Sex).

In a similar way, www.the-intimate-couple.com is designed to be a vehicle to communicate the truth of intimacy in marriage in ways that reflect God’s design and, at the same time, remain relevant to a culture.

Ready for the ultimate Valentine’s Day gift for your husband or your wife?! Why not get the 7 Day Sex Challenge Course?!

The 7-Day Sex Challenge is an eBook designed to put the sizzle back into your marriage! Carrie and I have been working on this for months, and believe it is finally ready. We have had the 7 day course “field tested” by some couples, and a few of their comments can be read here.