I'm Calling my Boyfriend to Make Sure He's Okay!

Question
"I've been with my boyfriend for almost two years. He's a firefighter, and as you might know firefighters work on 24 hour shift schedules. He's made it a point to not talk to me on the days that he works to avoid any future occurrences of calling too often at work.All I want to know is if he's safe but he thinks I'm being ridiculous. What should I do? How should I tell him that I only want to know that he's alright, and him believe that that is my only intent?"

Answer
Communication is the key here. Both of you need to make sure you actively listen to each other—to hear what is really being said, so that you can each understand the motives of your partner. It seems you are both experiencing some barriers to effective communication. Take a few minutes to read this article.

In this article, I quote a friend of mine—Brady Wilson, a communication expert, who talks about the push and pull approach to communicating. If both you and your boyfriend can pull conversation out from one another—and understand your mutual perspectives—you will then be able to come to a common, mutual understanding and remedy.

For example, if calling your boyfriend at his place of work is upsetting to him, perhaps he would agree to making a phone call to you during one of his lunch breaks…

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